113 degrees in Turkey!

Tony & Helen are half way around the world but still in touch with their Sandpiper family.

Thought you'ld like to see what they are up to.

Here is her latest email message:

After a very hot journey ınto the South Eastern part of Turkey, a few km from the Syrıan border we are back ın the caves of Cappadoccıa. What an hıstorıcal country....I was actually ın Abrahams cave....where he lıved 4000 years ago. And ın the vıllage where the humans planted the fırst seeds to become an agrıculutal socıety 9000 years BC. The cradle of cıvılızatıon for sure.
We met some arabs that lent us some clothes to beat the desert heat....ınsıde theır mud beehıve houses was actually cool even though ıt was 45 degrees outsıde.
I cant use my laptop here and am havıng a bıg problem wıth thıs turkısh keyboard, so wıll update my yahoo 360 some other tıme. ç ö £ ş i ğ ü

4th of July

We had a big turn out today for water volleyball. Three teams of 6-7 players. There were several day visitors, and some renters, too.

One of the perks for new renters is a free beach towel. Karen brought them over to the renters while they were poolside. Gorgeous, thick, luxurious towels.

We are planning a 4th of July celebration for Friday. Karen is providing hamburgers and beans, and we'll all play an extra day of volleyball.

VolleyBall Dilemma

What are we gonna do? As winter residents have left there has been a die hard group still playing water volleyball four times a week. In the hot, brutal sun and heat. Occasionally three teams, but lately two teams of five or six or seven is the norm.

When we take a break after three games (standard summer policy), much lively discussion ensues about how to manage the hoards who want to play volleyball come winter.

The input ranges from a laissez-faire attitude to downright Nazi-ism.

I personally lean towards the theory of self leveling. Just keep adding teams and people until it get so crowded that players go home in disgust. A matter of 'who breaks first'.


Jim on the other hand has a tendency to want to micro manage the problem to death. Probably a managment style left over from his
employed days.


Several players have chimed in with ideas:

1. Adding more days (H-less is working on that),


2. Having a sign-up sheet for the next players after the first 24 have formed three teams. Sign-ups rotate in as there is room from attrition.


3. Having individually assigned days to play.


4. Expanding the size of teams to 12 per side.


5. Letting whatever happens, happen. A no regulation policy.

Now, let me tell you about why control won't work. Earlier this week Jim brought up an idea that we should cancel VB on Thursdays for awhile 'cause it was getting hard to have enough players show up at 11am to begin play. Oh, usually there are 6 or 7 people per side, but they straggle in, over a couple of hours. We all discussed it and the thought was, yes, it would probably force a commitment to play on Wednesdays, and we'd have enough players to start play at 11. Decision made, note put on the board.

What happened you ask?

Jim & I went shopping Thursday morning. Entering back into the park we see a game of VB in the pool! OK! So they want to play, no problem. We have learned a lesson. If the net is up, they will come.

After all is said and done, nudists are an individualistic group of adventurers, so we shouldn't be surprised that they rebel against rules.

I am putting up a VB poll. Highly unscientific, with a small sample of voters so we won't learn much. Vote anyway!

(Google may be having problems with the poll feature. If it doesn't work just think about it...or email me your thoughts.)

A Message to the Sandpiper Family

Judy has sent out an email to update how they are dealing with his throat cancer. Tony & Judy lived this past winter season on lot 407. Sad tidings....

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Hi All......

We ended up in the ER yesterday AM and Tony was admitted with pneumonia......

Hospice will come by later today and finalize his admission into their program.....they gave us a booklet about the physiological stages of dying and following the path in the book, and although miracles do happen, he is likely only days from passing....a social worker has stopped by as well and provided additional support and Tony's brother in law has been great with details (knowing what to do and who to contact in the area, etc)......his sister is understandably having a very hard time and their family just this past Monday lost an uncle as well,

Tony is on a morphine pump and a patch for continuous pain management and getting fluids because he was terribly dehydrated (we just couldn't get him to eat or drink - apparently according to the hospice booklet, that is the natural progression of dying - and one aspect that families seem to have the most difficulty with)....he is receiving antibiotics for the pneumonia via IV as well....for the most part, he is as comfortable as can be expected....the folks at the hospital in Houston have been great....

the past 48 hours or so have been especially bittersweet.....we have laughed and cried and loved so much....this disease certainly leads family members to the 'letting go' stage more easily - what pain is endured by the patient!!!!

there are still many details to work out and while I have given some thought to what I will do after Tony is gone I haven't figured it all out just yet....

guess this is all for now......will keep you posted.....thanks for all of the support you have given us in the short time we have known you, and for the wonderful thoughts and prayers sent our way.....

I don't have my Sandpiper directory with me so there are many folks I wanted to include in this email, but unfortunately couldn't, so please share my email at your discretion......

Thanks again for all you have been to Tony & me.....Judy

Need a massage?

Interesting poll results, don't you think? More that 2 to 1 in favor of nude living versus clothing optional. I believe Sandpiper's is headed towards being a nudist resort instead of a clothing optional one, so the results of this (small and unscientific) poll should be encouraging to Karen & Jay.

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Summer residents at Sandpiper's are taking it easy, trying to keep cool. No construction has started yet and the plans are fluid. There has been an ongoing legal issue keeping Karen busy and stressed. Hopefully it will be resolved soon, but you know, this particular "issue" has been hanging on for years.

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Have you seen this pest?

American cockroach...disgusting! We haven't had many bug problems this year. We have had so little rain that mosquitos are virtually nonexistant, except near the front gate planter because of the automatic water system. There are flies around, and gnats, too, but not in huge numbers. And I truly haven't seen many cockroaches...except this morning when a granddaddy roach jumped out of a half empty potting soil bag. It ran like crazy so I'm sure it was more startled than me.

No...I was more startled. My scream proved it. It didn't scream.

Rick's sister Pam has been sharing her bedroom with what we always called a Palmetto Bug. I used to think it was a different species, but according to the Wikipedia it is simply a large, LARGE, Southern Cockroach.

Odds on, if you live in the South, you have already encountered a Palmetto Bug or two. What are they? Simply stated, a Cockroach. But not your ordinary run of the mill cockroach. No, they are nothing like the cute little creepy crawlies you see in Orkin commercials.

For one thing, Palmetto Bugs tend to be a bit larger then your average roach. I'm not kidding when I say that I have seen them grow to three inches or more. You may think cockroaches are gross, but the experience is much more vivid when all the gory details are magnified. As if that wasn't enough, Palmetto Bugs can fly!

Yes, fly.

You have never been creeped out, until you see a three inch roach fly up and land on the table next to you. And it gets worse, Palmetto Bugs aren't afraid of the light. You're just as likely to encounter one during the day as at night. The last little detail to distinguish the Palmetto Bug from your average cockroach is that they are armored. Step on one and you're lucky if you get its attention. You don't even get the pleasure of squishing one.

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So far this summer I been hibernating during the afternoon heat and reading. I just discovered Greg Iles, a mystery writer I had previously missed. Great summer reads. I just finished five of them and liked Dead Sleep the best. The characters have depth; they're interesting and likeable, or unlikeable, as the case may be. The colorful descriptions of pre-Katrina New Orleans were spot on, and the pace is relentless. I highly recommend both the book and the author.

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If you are enjoying this blog please let me know thru a comment or email. I need feedback to keep my enthusiasm going. (Thanks Alan, you are just about the only person leaving comments).

Love in the Bowling Alley, or How I got to Sandpiper's by Rick & Kathie

Sue, I thought I would give you my story of becoming a nudist.

Three years ago at the bowling alley, I met a nudist. His name was Rick.

After a couple of weeks we were put on the same alley and he finally got up the nerve to ask me out. This was a Monday. I had borrowed a movie from a friend that I was going to invite him over to see, but, he invited me to his house to watch it instead. He lived here at Sandpiper's.

When we got here, I told him that he could get naked if he liked since I knew he was a nudist. Then, I went into the bathroom, took a deep breath and got naked myself. You see I was going through a bad divorce at the time and I decided I need to look at changing things in my life. Well, as you know I changed a lot.

By-the-way, I never did watch that movie. We necked instead.

That same week Rick took me to the nude beach on South Padre Island, where I proceeded to get really sun-burned!!! There were parts of me that had only seen the sun when I would flash them for beads on float-trips. I had to wear a shirt in the pool most of the summer.

I liked it so well here a Sandpipers that I know I will stay a nudist. So, I called all my children and let them know that I was going to be a nudist. That wearing clothes was too hot. They said they were glad they were grown because they still had bad childhood memories of 'Mom picking them up from school in a tube top.'

Oh well that's my story and I am sticking to it.

Kathie

SunDogs, IceBows & Puppies

While playing water volleyball recently, as I threw up the ball to serve, I was distracted by a halo around the sun. We called the halo a sun-dog, but I recently learned that isn't what it was. A sun-dog is a bright spot on the halo; this was more aptly called an icebow.

What could it mean?

**1. A new age is dawning.
**2. Dust from the Sahara.
**3. Means a new pope has been elected.
**4. A hurricane will be here within 48 hours.

Maybe instead, this explanation for the ring, from Nasa: "... thin cirrus clouds plus bright sunlight almost guarantee seeing something wonderful. Cirrus clouds are made of millions of hexagonal ice crystals 3 to 6 miles up in the troposphere where jet airplanes fly--each crystal acting as a tiny prism refracting (bending) the sun's light and throwing it elsewhere into the sky."
So...off to the on-line encyclopedia:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_(optical_phenomenon)


Now dogs on the other hand need no explanation. We love them, they love us. Unconditional love. (You are either a dog person, or not...if not, well, my sympathies).

There are several dogs in the park worth a mention. Because I live so close to them, my next door neighbors in fact, my favorite dogs are Xena & Kalie. They love to come over and search out crumbs from Jim's potato chip obsession. I call them my merry maids. Xena loves to hunt for lizards, Kalie loves to chase tennis balls. Both carry their favorite "baby" (dog language for cuddly stuffed toy) everywhere.

One of the best times was when the pool was drained for repair work a few years ago. Right before draining it was open for all park dogs to go swimming. Bob & Ann's little black poodle swam his little heart out, but was really impressive were those two water dogs, Kalie & Xena endlessly jumping in one end of the pool after a tennis ball, swimming the length, then running around the pool to do it again, and again, and again. They finally collapsed in doggie ecstasy.

Right across the street from us are now two more big dogs, Asia and Koda. Huge rotties. Scary looking, mean, dangerous...right?

Wrong! These are the sweetest dogs. The little one, Asia, (relatively speaking) is mama. Her son, Koda, is huge with LONG legs. Koda was attacked once by Abby, Chic & Don's teeny tiny Yorkie. Abby weighs about 4 ounces. Koda weighs about a thousand pounds. Abby launched herself at Koda and latched onto his neck, dangling her little legs several feet from the ground, growling and shaking him....she thought. Actually she just waved back and forth in the breeze. Koda looked to the left, looked to the right, trying to puzzle out just what was happening to him. When he figured it out he just collapsed in shock, rolled over and gave up. Some killer, that Abby.


Koda & Asia


Stretch & Kate, our other next door neighbors are down to one little Chihuahua now. Fenn went to doggie heaven a little while back so it's just Lucy now. Lucy has her own story. Kate was on her motorcycle when she noticed a tiny dog in the street, trying to get back into his fenced puppy farm yard, but the other dogs kept her out. So she scooped Lucy up and gave her a home full of love. It took awhile for Lucy to trust, but now she is affectionate and sweet as can be.

Do me a favor!? Click on the comment right below this entry and tell about your favorite dog, or cat. Is anyone out there?

How To Be A Hot Babe and Stay Cool!

It is getting warm...that is an understatement! We are hitting 100 degrees every afternoon and nights are in the mid to upper 70's. It'll be that way for the next 4 months. Tomatoes are withering, plants are looking parched, and we need to stay cool.

One way to keep cool is to spend your days at the pool. Four days a week we have a great time playing water volleyball. Anyone can play, everyone has a great time.

There are a few "rules" at a clothing optional resort. Number one rule revolves around the word "optional". It means just that. You don't have to be nude. You can wear as little or as much as you want to.

But it's hot. Durn hot! What to do?

I suggest a pareo, or sarong. It can save the day. For one thing if you are wearing a pareo you don't have to haul around a towel to sit on. (That's a universal rule at ALL clothing optional or nudist venues). For another, it can actually be used as a towel...a quick dry off after a pool dip. Thirdly, it covers you if you have a little too much sun, or there are outside workmen on the property. We aren't shy but sometimes you just have to cover up.

You can wear a pareo in so many ways. I discovered a great video with an amazing number of ways to tie your pareo. It is almost 15 minutes long, but you can skip ahead to the end to watch a cute Polynesian guy do skirt wraps. You can find really nice pareo's on line, make them yourself with a couple of yards of fabric, or Vicki sells lovely pareos and other tropical cover-ups at our monthly Junque & Java.

Check out this video
http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-tie-a-sarong

We Have Shade!

I posted this picture in my Yahoo blog a couple of weeks ago but I think it really needs to be here. See, we do work in the summer.

Karen, with Larry Dean's advise and help from Tony, Renee, Angel and just about everybody in the park, has provided a really spiffy gazebo for extra shade by the pool.

We took time in between cut-throat volleyball matches to pick up, center and just generally help with unsolicited advise. After being bolted into the cement it is apparent that this thing will not move. It's a real quality piece and looks great by the pool. It is supposed to be for smoker's shade but we are all using it. Thanks Karen, both smokers and non-smokers will benefit.

We've been enjoying the gazebo for a few weeks now and let me tell you, it is great! There is a nice cooling breeze most of the time. Sitting in the doorway of the pavilion just cannot compare.

I tried to be discreet...all the best nudists are wearing orange fig leaves this year.

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Construction on the new shower house is about to begin. It will be on the east side of the pool (tennis side) and will have a couple of toilets and, of course, the showers. I'll get some pictures of progress up as it occurs.

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Here is an update from Neet & Ken. Our thoughts are certainly with them in this difficult time.

"Well, it is count down. For those of you I don't talk with daily we are on go for surgery.
We go in Monday the 16th for a heart Cath. then tuesday for the actual surgery. Heart doctor doesn't think the lymph node surgery went as well as he wanted but, can not wait any longer to replace the valve. If he ends up being able to repair it it will give us a better chance of survival down the road.All your thoughts and prayers are what keeps us going. Kenneth said today it was a shame this is the best he has felt in 15 years and he is going to come out of this feeling awful...we still have our humor!
hugs to all,
Neet, Kenneth and Katfish."

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Got a postcard from Dave & Sandy. They are shivering in Alaska but having a great time.

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Bob & Mardi stopped on their way north to visit BlueBonnet, where they ran into Stephen and Charlotte...and Amadillo where they got a water volleyball fix.

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Frankie & Dick are freezing and swatting mosquitoes in Minnesota, at Avatan.

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Catherine & Bob are just about to leave Tommy & Terry's place in Missouri to head back to Indiana. Dr. B has a new horse, Genuine Dreamer, and Catherine won first place and some money at Calf Sorting last Tuesday evening with a ten-year-old boy as her team-mate.

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Bob & Bernie are fighting floods in Indiana...boy, could we use some of that rain here!

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Phaleta has become a nudist poster girl. She's been in the AANR bulletin twice in as many months. Check out the May issue for her Prarie Haven picture, and this month she and I are modeling her body painting.

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We are still occasionally fielding three teams for water volleyball tho Bob & Bev are leaving for Colorado on Monday, and Lanny & Donna have already left, headed west, so we may be down to two teams for the rest of the summer. That new gazebo sure comes in handy for breaks. Petanque has it's die-hards. Tommy (Evelyn) usually can be found there, along with Charlie, Gene, & Nick.

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Landscaping Idea! How about a new fountain?

During one of our early visits to Sandpiper's Resort we had a small incident involving an early departure, an impetuous moment and a geyser.

It was early, early, early. Crack o' dawn early. It is a 12 hour drive with an RV to get back to our (then) New Orleans home, and we wanted to get going as early as possible but we had even beaten the birds. While I walked the dog Jim did all the little last minute chores, like unhooking the water hose, disengaging the sewer hook-up...that kind of thing.

He was to WAIT til I returned with the dog before hooking up the car...WAIT!

Did he wait? Of course not.

Nickie was taking her own sweet time. I was in the far corner of the property. In fact I was probably standing in what is now our lot, but back then (only 6 years ago) it was a caliche road with only a few houses on it. While I was standing there gazing across the big empty field, trying to give my dog privacy (I am sensitive that way) my eye rested on movement at the far end of the 500 row, just about where Jim is supposed to be WAITING.

He is in the RV, and BACKING UP WITHOUT ME TO GUIDE HIM! IS HE NUTS?

Next thing I see is a geyser; 40 feet of gushing water shooting straight up. It actually looked pretty cool, but the first thought thru my head was, "Can I just keep walking the dog and not go back there?"

Jim had backed up over the water pipe that served our spot, severing it and knocking out water for the whole park. Next he jumps into the car and races frantically to find Manager Dick, who isn't at home and isn't cleaning the pool. So Jim roars round and round the park at top speed searching.

Well that 'top speed' got Dick's attention. He flagged Jim down and said, in Dick's charming way, "Sir, can I help you? You seem disturbed." Or something to that effect. You all know Dick.

All Jim had to do was turn, and point to 'Old Faithful'. Well, they finally found the water turn-off valve for the park and got the flooding under control. About that time people began emerging from their tin cocoons questioning why there was no water for their morning coffee or showers or shaving. All fingers pointed our way.

Jim is really very handy when it comes to plumbing, so he tried to help the small crew that formed to fix the problem. He advised them that they should probably wait a bit before turning the water back on to give the goop holding the pipes together time to set up. They really didn't appreciate his advise however, and the pipe blew again.

About this time Dick advised that it was probably time we left. He never said anything about "never darken my door". He may have thought it, but he never said it...so we came back. Again and again, and finally we live here full time.

Beautiful park, but I really think the field needs a cool water feature, like a giant geyser/fountain.

Plants that LOVE South Texas

Bougainvillia is everyone's favorite big block of color. Heat hardy, water thrifty and available in many colors, from pastels to vibrant hues. Now what you may not know is it is available in the standard big size (which you can keep trimmed, and should) but also in a ground cover size. The ground cover size is still a big plant but it does want to stay lower than the standard. Bougies can be grown as a shrub, as a vine, in a container, but beware, they all have thorns.




Hibiscus are plants we can grow in the ground in our area. Oh, an occasional freeze may do them in but from the size of plants around town it doesn't happen too often. I grow mine in pots just because I don't have much room. They need lots, tons, of water in the summer so I position my double ruffly apricot one under a drip line of my gutter. On humid (we know what they feel like, right?) mornings the drip waters the tub enough for the whole day.

Esperanza, Texas Golden Bells, Tecoma are all local names for this large shrub. You see it everywhere. It loves the sun, the heat. What people don't do is keep it pruned. If you do that it becomes a well mannered shrub just covered in bloom. I have a couple in big tubs, but I would put them in the ground if I had room.

Pentas, also called Egyptian Star Flower by some, attracts butterflies and Hummingbirds. It comes in pinks, reds and white and in the ground can grow to small shrub size. Great in pots or in the ground, it doesn't want full sun in our climate. Gorgeous plant even though you may lose some leaves to hungry caterpillars.

Sunflowers...they are everywhere! But aren't they charming?

There are several kinds growing in the front fountain garden, all either volunteers (a weed by any other name) or from a pack of wildflower seed donated by Lisette.

If you want to grow petunias plant them early. With luck they will grow thru the winter. If you put them in when the weather gets warm go for the Wave varieties, especially the purple. It is very heat resistant. This is a pink wave I have in a container.

Here is an interesting variety of common rubber plant. This one has lovely green and cream coloring with splashes of maroon on it's leaves. I never see others around the area, just the common green kind.


Plumbago. I can't tell you how many people ask me about this plant. We can't grow hydrangeas here so this is a great substitute. Loves heat, loves sun, drought tolerant, and if you keep it pruned it can become a mass of blue. It also comes in white. It needs control, however. if you don't keep it pruned you will soon have a twiggy mass.


Plumeria, Frangipani. It grows in Hawaii as a small tree and is used to make flower leis. Lovely, sweet smelling flowers. Can grow in a tub or in the ground. It is very tropical which means if not protected you will lose it in a freeze, but I've seen some big ones around town, and Bob & Bev have a nice sized one by their house. There is also one growing right by the front gate. However! It loses it's leaves in the winter, which gives it a nice architectural form, but some people don't appreciate that. It is extremely easy to root and I have a bunch so if you want one, let me know. Marianna is on the trail of a white one. All mine are this pretty pink.


I hope you enjoyed this quick view of some of the plants that grow here at Sandpiper's in South Texas.

Garden Update

I thought those of you not here for the summer would like to see how some of the gardens are looking.

The serenity garden to the north of the pool is growing nicely. Oh, there are always weeds, but the wanted plants are maturing and flowering. The nastusiums I planted from seed this winter are finished and gone, but the cosmos are starting to bloom to fill the void.

The entrance fountain garden is full of color and not too choked with weeds. The birds are still using it as a private spa.

Around the pool the containers are thriving with the automatic watering system. Lots of compliments on the colorful flowers.

I am in the process of learning how to arrange pictures in this blog. You would think it would be easy, but not so. It involves changing html code and I haven't done that for several years. Use it or lose it, you know?!

Next blog I am going to show some plants extremely suitable to this area. Colorful, easy to grow and love the heat.

Lisette & Gary's First Time

Ahhh, the first response to my plea for 'first time' stories. This is how Gary & Lisette ended up at Sandpipers Resort.

Lisette writes:

Our first time was in 2003, after Gary's house burned at Swallows Resort during the San Diego fires. He started looking for another nudist park to move to. First he went to Arizona, then all over Florida, but didn't find anything. So I met him in San Antonio and we went to Riverside, but didn't like it. The owner told us about Sandpipers so we drove the 250 miles to come and see.

When we drove in I told him I could live here, so we stayed for one night and went to the pool and got sprayed with water guns to welcome us to the park! We just loved it.
It took us a year after that to move here and get a new home .

We just love this kind of life, so relaxing and what a bunch of nice people we've met.

Lisette & Gary

Sun Set Shining Thru Sheer Chiffon Makes Men Salivate.

Clothing, or rather lack of, is a very interesting subject to ponder.

Case in point:

There is a small group of us, six or eight, that plays a card/marble board game every Friday night. Four men, four women, divided into two teams. Battle of the sexes so to speak. It's hot in Texas; our homes, while air conditioned, are warm. We live in a clothing optional resort. Do the math...we don't wear much. Oh, we ladies usually are decked out with jewelry, sometimes a flowing pareo (that means we don't have to schlep along a towel to sit on), wrapped around hips or tied traditionally. Guys usually wear nothing. We are used to it. It's matter-of-fact, every day stuff here.

Except last Friday.

One of our ladies came thru the west facing doorway at sunset wearing a sheer sarong. The golden sun outlined her body through the chiffon. She was absolutely lovely, glowing. You could literally hear the guys jaws drop on the floor. All night and even the next day the talk was of that sheer sarong. Yet if she had walked in naked...Nothing! Nada! Nobody would have noticed anything. What's up with that?

Case in point:

We play volleyball at the pool several times a week. Balls are flying everywhere and have to be retrieved by runners we affectionately call Ball Babes. They can be passers-by, players or spectators. Most are completely nude. No big deal, look where we live. In the pool everyone is nude (except for an occasional shirt to block sun exposure). Yet when a lovely young thing was retrieving balls last week wearing a bikini bottom most of the guy's heads did that swivel thing we all recognize. Naked she was just another body. With that swim suit on...man, oh, man...sex pot!

And the guys will admit this! They laugh ruefully, and shake their heads. They can live among nudes, then go to a strip club...PAY, to see naked women. I shake my head, too.

Ahhh! Aren't we an interesting bunch of old geezers?

Oh...if you want to know what happened with Friday nights Joker game check out my other blog (link is at the top of the page). Thank you Karen & Jan for participating!

How I Got Hit On at The Luau!

Jim & I had been at Sandpiper's Clothing Optional Resort in Edinburg, Texas for only a few days, soaking up the sun...maybe a little too much as I was getting pretty sunburned... when it was announced that a pig roast and luau were on the schedule for the weekend.

Wear Hawaiian themes, make flower leis. Oh boy, right up my alley! We had been married in Hawaii in 1967, I knew how to do Hawaiian. A trip to the craft store got me a bunch of silk flowers. A pareo wrap, lots of flower leis around the neck and in the hair, purple orchids to contast with my red glow. I was a vision!

There was dancing, music, great food and drink. At our table was a young (to me anyway) couple visiting for the weekend, in one of the rental units. She was a teeny little thing with lots of red hair. They both had been drinking beer all day, not eating, and were completely blitzed.

We conversed.

She reached out and began to stroke my pareo, in the bosomy region."Nice material." she slurred. "I have to ask, as I'm new here. Is this a swinging club?"

No, says I, eyes rolling back in my head in horror. Tis a family club, straight as an arrow, no hanky panky. Pure family values! None of that stuff here, no siree!

She kept stroking.

Next, she turns to Jim who is angled away from us, having a completely different kind of conversation with whomever is on the far side.

"Jim", she pokes him. "Jim".

He turned to her with arched eyebrows. She purrs, "Your wife is hot!".

"No", says he, "She's just sunburned."

He turns back to his previous conversation, oblivious.

We left the party soon after.

Jim was admonished later by Frankie, the then manager. "When your wife says leave, you leave."

There have been a few, very, very few, incidents over the years. One couple was asked repeatedly to tone down the display they were making of themselves by the pool. They were asked to leave.

Mostly human sexuality issues don't even exist here. We aren't blind, just sensible. We enjoy the person, not the person's physique. OK. I lie. We look, who could not. But it's no big deal. Unfortunately.

How to be a Chick Magnet

Birds! You love birds, you come to South Texas for world class birdwatching. Now, I'm no expert by any means, but I have a bird ID book and binoculars within easy reach, and I put up hummingbird feeders twice a year for the hummer migrations. And Jim is a real seed and feeder connoisseur, even if the birds ignore his mixtures. So I was very pleased to read about our resident bird experts, Dave & Sandy, and their identification of a new bird discovered in their New York back yard, now named the Junkins Warbler. How exciting to have an animal named after you!

Which leads me to today's topic...men's nose hair. Stay with me.

In today's paper is a picture of a New Jersey barn swallow being artificially colored with a marker to darken his plumage to the level of the naturally darkest swallows...the ones the females find most attractive. Previous to the make-up application these pitiful little birds were the nerds in their world. Ignored by the lady birds, over weight, shy. A little natural male enhancement and their confidence increased, the ladies found them irresistible, their weight went down, their testosterone went up. See, if guys are more attractive they get more sex. It's just part of nature.

So men, take a hint from the mighty New Jersey barn swallow...no, no, no...don't color yourselves with markers! Just trim those nose hairs (and fart in private, please) and you too will be a winner with the ladies.

My First Visit to Sandpiper's Resort

Hurray! The first (of many we can only hope) Sandpiper themed blogs. Let's start with a story, shall we.

Several years ago Jim & I were driving across country in our new-to-us Airstream LandYacht...from New Orleans, heading west. Visits to kids in Arizona, maybe go see the Grand Canyon, the kind of thing you do when newly retired with an RV. Now I knew Jim was a nudist at heart. Heck, couldn't keep clothes on him at home, even with neighbors and family popping in at odd moments. So I wasn't completely surprised when he tentatively asked if I would go along with his plans to drop down to South Texas as we returned home from this month long trip, to visit a clothing optional resort. No pressure, he assured me, to disrobe, as it is CLOTHING OPTIONAL! And, as further incentive, he would do all the kitchen clean up work in the RV for the whole trip.

Yowzers! Took me all of a half second to agree. So we did.

He had his clothes off and was puttering around outside the rig even before I had looked my fill, peeping from the windows at NAKED people, just walking around doing ordinary stuff. My first experiment had me sitting in a lawn chair, reading a book in the sun, wrapped round and round with a pareo. Not bad. A good feeling, kinda free. Til a neighbor lady walked up to introduce herself, and, as I peered up from my reclining position I saw thing even a gynecologist probably couldn't identify.

Whoa. Culture shock, but I survived.

It was a very warm day, and I knew you had to go into the pool sans bathing suit. When Jim mentioned there was a water aerobics class about to start I just picked myself up and never looked back. Fat people, wrinkled people, skinny people, scarred people. People with one leg, mastectomies, scars from cancer or accidents. I have yet to see a perfect body. I always see people of all ages enjoying life, reveling in the freedom of fresh air and sunshine on their bodies. And interesting people! Must be something about the kind of person willing to take a chance on this out-of-the-mainstream style of living, cause the people I've met and become dear friends with are interesting, complex, and adventurous. I've met doctors, truck drivers, college professors, bankers, nurses, teachers, farmers, rich, not-so-rich and downright poverty stricken. Horsemen, pilots, artists, writers, bird watchers, gardeners...what a great bunch of characters.

Do you have a 'First Time' story to share?

Next time is a story you really don't want to miss. How I got hit on at the luau.